Stressful, exhausting, and overwhelming. Your anxiety level is almost always at an all time high. You have constant meetings and emails that make you feel like you work at the White House. The clerical demands make you want to burn any piece of paper in sight and the most hurtful thing is when a parent isn't on your side.
This year was a challenge in so many ways, but I knew that God placed every single one of my students in my classroom for a reason. From the boy who struggles with ODD to the girl who came to me unable to speak English.
He makes no mistakes.
I loved each and every one of them like my life depended on it. Because their lives do…
Today we had our end of the year class celebration. Parents were warned that I was an emotional wreck. I read this note to my kids:
Dear 4G,
You have been a joy to teach. I wish you the best of luck in 5th grade. I know you will do great. Dream big and read, read, read. When life starts to pick up pace, don't forget to slow down. Smell the flowers, make new friends, sit in the grass and blow bubbles. There is joy all around you, you just have to look for it.
Love always,
Mrs. Marvin
Yep, by the end of the note I had snot rolling to my chin and looked like a sweaty marsupial full of tears. I tried to hold it in, I really did. However, the last days of school are the hardest.
I begin every school year with an introduction and an "I love you". Someone always needs to hear it. When they get on the busses tomorrow, some will have a summer of fun in the pool or go on vacations with their family…some won't. Some will watch younger siblings or yearn for attention while their parents have to work two shifts to make ends meet. Some will miss the "I love you's" and hugs. Some will even miss the meals.
I don't know what their futures hold. I know that every year, when the busses turn the corner with their hands waving, a piece of me leaves. For 180 days they were mine. Though the days weren't always full of sunshine, we learned to play when it rained.
After drying my face and regaining composure I reminded my students that of all the lessons they were taught, the one I wanted them to remember most is that love is most important. "I watched you cry as you learned the new way to divide. I watched you struggle with fractions. I wanted to hold you and push the lessons to the side. I had standards to teach, but your heart ALWAYS comes first. Kindness is important. If you treat others with kindness and lead with your heart, you can achieve anything"
I distributed the bubbles and we went outside and blew our fears away.
Tomorrow when I return to my quiet room and read the notes they leave for me on the board, I'll touch each desk and recall each child. I'll give them back to Him.
Teaching is…
A blessing.
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